Magi - Labyrinth of Magic Chapter 218

[aoi]

Magi


And now back to your regularly scheduled programming


Read Online: SE Reader
Download: MF

[KingAlibaba]

You seem to have two people working as QCers. Looking at some of the chapter's lines I'd say hire a third one who actually speaks English.

Oops, where are my manners? Thanks for the "early" release. =)

[aoi]

Ummmm Raiger checked the foreign words.
And my first lang is English.

[KingAlibaba]

Okay cool. Let's take a quick look at this "English" release, then.

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/3
Is the whole species called "Momo"? If not, 'they' is wrong here. Use 'he' instead.

"by the way, according to what the manticore's leader" -> manticores'

Same mistake in the next panel. "Manticore's language" -> Manticores' language. 1 manticore; 2 manticores.


We're still on the first page. "So that's means"

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/6

"did terrible things to Momo and their family" Here you imply that the magicians did terrible things to THEIR families, not Momo's. Change it to "Momo and his family"

same page "the one guilty for that" -> guilty of that

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/8

"I can just imagine how it was sad for them" -> how sad it was for them/sad it must've been for them

same page "Now that I see you thinking about something that never occurred to you until yesterday, thinking about the feelings of the ones you considered beasts, and see that face on you of someone who is desperately trying to image how it would feel." This one really hurt. Try saying it out loud without cringing.
Try something along the lines of

"Now that I see you thinking about something that has never happened to you until yesterday -- considering the feelings of those you viewed as beasts once -- with that desperate expression of empathy on your face..."

Those are just a few of the things I found while casually reading the chapter. Errors you as the QC-person should be able to see on your first read as well.

[aoi]

1: Momo is not specified as a boy or a girl. "They" is a proper gender-neutral pronoun. See the singular they. Would you have preferred I use "her or she", "hir", "s/he" or "zir"? I cannot use "it" because the main thing is that Sheba now sees the Manticores as people and equals. "It" reduces them to objects. Also no one uses "one" in casual conversation. Had I used the generic "he", as you so suggested, everyone would assume Momo is a boy. However Momo is typically a female name. Ergo "they".

2: Manticore is a species. So it's perfectly ok to say Manticore's just like how you can say Human's. That or we just have different versions of English.

3: Whoops.

4: See 1.

5: See 1

6: I should've rephrased that to:

Now that I see you thinking about something that never occurred to you until yesterday, thinking about the feelings of the ones you considered beasts, and I see that face of yours, of someone who is desperately trying to imagine how it would feel.

Certainly I could change it to your suggestion, but the original wording was decided through PR.

7: I've reading through this chapter 6 or 7 times now. Sometimes I miss shit, yeah? That's why there's the magic of V2s.

[frogmage]

Okay cool. Let's take a quick look at this "English" release, then.

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/3
Is the whole species called "Momo"? If not, 'they' is wrong here. Use 'he' instead.

"by the way, according to what the manticore's leader" -> manticores'

Same mistake in the next panel. "Manticore's language" -> Manticores' language. 1 manticore; 2 manticores.


We're still on the first page. "So that's means"

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/6

"did terrible things to Momo and their family" Here you imply that the magicians did terrible things to THEIR families, not Momo's. Change it to "Momo and his family"

same page "the one guilty for that" -> guilty of that

http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/8

"I can just imagine how it was sad for them" -> how sad it was for them/sad it must've been for them

same page "Now that I see you thinking about something that never occurred to you until yesterday, thinking about the feelings of the ones you considered beasts, and see that face on you of someone who is desperately trying to image how it would feel." This one really hurt. Try saying it out loud without cringing.
Try something along the lines of

"Now that I see you thinking about something that has never happened to you until yesterday -- considering the feelings of those you viewed as beasts once -- with that desperate expression of empathy on your face..."

Those are just a few of the things I found while casually reading the chapter. Errors you as the QC-person should be able to see on your first read as well.

[KingAlibaba]

1. I'd much rather use 'he' instead and change it afterwards if Momo were to be revealed as a girl later on. In this case 'they' might be grammatically correct, but is a stylistic mistake.

2. Wait, here you use 'Manticore' as both the singular and plural version, but use 'Manticores' in the first paragraph? Wouldn't you then have to go back and change every usage of the word 'djinns' into 'djinn' when speaking of its plural version? For consistency's sake, you know.

3. /

4. Once again, a stylistic error. Contextually, it implies that the magicians killed or subjugated their OWN families, not Momo's. I'd once again assign a gender and work from there.

5. /

6. That's still not how any native speaker would talk. But that seems to have been a collective decision, so I can't help you I'm afraid.

7. "I've reading through this chapter" ooh you're making this way too easy for me, my dear. But I take it that was a mere typo and will leave it at that.

8. http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/12

"this is not was I was doing" You should take your time when going through the chapter, QC-san.

9. http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/13

"this is the reward for blah blah" -> This is the punishment for blah blah

same page "die from the fangs of" -> "die by the fangs of"

10. http://reader.sensescans.com/reader/read/magi__labyrinth_of_magic/en/15/218/page/14

"the one who did things no one could never forgive" -> no one could ever forgive

And now there's even the magic of V3s. Magic sure is awesome.
While I'm at it- mind telling me, or us, the fans, what caused this humongous delay this week? Or somehow implement a status message on the top/side of the page to let people know how things are going?

[OmegaZen]

It's no one's business what happens in personal life. Get over it.

[frogmage]

Oh, I'm so freaking sorry for having a life outside of scanlating. I didn't realize that this was my full time job and my income comes from it. Wow, what was I thinking. I better just do my scanlation duties or else I won't have food to eat or money to pay for my internet!!!

[KingAlibaba]

It's no one's business what happens in personal life. Get over it.

Now you showed me.
Nowhere did I mention aoi's personal life. I was pointing out mistakes and inquired about the chapter's status. But if memory serves right, you lot get offended by petty things way too easily anyway.

Thanks for confirming my words, proofreader-kun.

[OmegaZen]

Or you could use a fragment of common sense and realize it isn't our career to get online for free and upload these chapters for free. If there's ever a delay in something like this, it should automatically occur to you, "Oh. Something must be happening off of the internet. I guess I'll go outside or something."

[saltncheese]

While I'm at it- mind telling me, or us, the fans, what caused this humongous delay this week?

Life, do you have it?

Or somehow implement a status message on the top/side of the page to let people know how things are going?

Money down?

[annarancs]

As always, thanks for the chapter!

[Masgrande]

Thanks for the chapter !!!

[Nickname]

Is nobody gonna mention the random groping going on in this chapter?